22 November.
Want to post something here but I really don't know what to write about. So many drafts saved and not published, just because there are so many people out there waiting to judge every word I write here. Or maybe there isn't, maybe I'm just thinking too much. But well, people always surprise me.
I guess I'll just write my thoughts down vaguely, because if I continue bottling it up I might drive myself crazy.
You know that feeling, when you realize that the person you've known for years turned out to be someone who you've never imagined s/he would be? It's like all the memories spent together with him/her start to play in your head, and each word, each stare, each action of that person that once moved you, suddenly becomes hypocritical. It's more than just disappointment. Because disappointments are linked with hope and expectation, and in our relationship, I believe there were more. Snugged in between the little pieces of hope and expectation, there were trust. Reliance. Respect. Patience. And love. Not love-love, but I do love you, because you are more important to me than you can ever imagine.
But boy, that was my last straw. I've never lost faith in anyone as much as I did for you. And I swear it affects me so fucking much, and my life will never be the same anymore.
我真的高兴不起来。
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嘴巴上说要把你忘了,还抱着这一丝丝的希望干嘛。Qidi you're such a joke.
